Life Jugaad- Married Life and how to make it work

The institution of marriage has risks that are increasing as we progress as a society. In countries like the USA, more people are choosing to stay single or live together without getting married. Among people who are getting married, the rate of divorce slowly keeps rising.

Is there a Jugaad or tricks to make a marriage work? I don't think there is a Jugaad or an easy way to make it last forever. Every relationship has a foundation in the form of love and respect in the purest form. However, in the materialistic world, it is also based on needs, tolerance and acceptance. 

Stock trading and Driving

Today, the markets were crashing, and surprisingly, in one Volleyball WhatsApp group, some discussion about markets and trading started. After some exchange of opinions and outlooks, one friend posted a good analogy and referred to stock trading as like driving. ("Trust in your driving skill and Luck than worrying about DUI..by others. Know that it exists.") Well said. Stock trading and driving- I have done enough of both the last few years- to the extremes of loving them, and hating them too. Thanks to COVID, I am spending that time of 405 on Mt McCoy and biking on Simi's streets the last two years. Still, sometimes, I miss the road  Anyway, enjoy some parallels as I relate them to each other.

I do think stock trading is very much like driving on a road or a freeway. When you are in traffic, you generally feel that you are in the wrong lane (investments)- you have made a wrong choice. Still, you may decide to hold on a bit longer, just to find that your chosen stock is still not moving as quickly as others are moving. You see or feel that cars in the other lane are going faster so finally you give up and you change lanes (investments) only to find that the lane (investments) you exited has now started going faster :( This is more common than an exception.

Unlike cars in driving, stock trading allows one to quickly change investments, or add new investments. It is all digital. You just need to push some buttons. Some car zooms past you on the freeway, and you feel that it is really a car you must be in! You press some buttons and you are in! Once you are in, miraculously somehow it slows down or stops ! This happens to most of us if not all with the stocks we pick to invest in. This happens once or twice and you start doubting and neglecting opportunities to jump into fast-moving stocks. However, now it is different. When you choose not to invest in them, they keep going up and up! Then regrets come first for missing out on the opportunity that you seriously believed in. You again get convinced that you really do have eyes for good cars (stocks). Then you again start jumping lanes, switching cars, and maybe it is your weight or your bad luck, the story repeats. You generally end up thinking why does this happen only to you. If you buy, it doesn't move. if you don't, it keeps going up! When you should be changing lanes, you don't, and when you shouldn't be, you do. This is not because you are stupid. It is because of how mysterious and enormous the systems (markets) are for one brain to decode. Now we are frustrated enough to quit trading. However, some invisible hand starts favoring you (like a stranger giving you some free alcohol or smoke when you are thinking to quit), and your choices to change lanes, or stay put appear to be turning correct! Voila! You are back in the game, back on the roller coaster ;). 

Markets are more like congested freeways. Highly competitive. You try changing lanes hoping to beat the traffic (other drivers) but then you realize that it is difficult to beat the markets. It is not worth the hassle. Other times, driving becomes dull and tiring, and you decide to stop driving yourself. You decide to get on the bus and have someone (a portfolio manager) do the driving for you. You pay his fees (fare). Most of the buses seem to be going slower than most cars on the freeway. However, unlike most car drivers, bus drivers are for the long haul. Professional drivers generally beat regular drivers. I drove on the 405 freeway for a few years. If you are in LA, you probably know Life on 405.  (Click here to see to some photos I took on the 405 freeway) For me, the benchmark for success was to beat the LAX shuttle bus that runs between LAX and Van Nuys airport. The drivers of these buses, like seasoned portfolio managers, do know the 405 better than most ordinary drivers. This is how those who are not meant for the rigors of trading become passive investors.

In driving, often comes a time when you feel like you are flying. You are going full cylinders. (All those passive passengers in the bus look at you with hidden but obvious jealousy!) You don't see anything that can go wrong. You start driving from 65-70 mph to 100-110 mph, even around 140-150 miles per hour. You miss to acknowledge the risks, and from nowhere comes the Subprime crisis, dot-com burst, or Covid outbreak, and you find it impossible to press the brake in time. You are suddenly in some fog, your vision is blurred and before you realize it, you end up losing all that took you a few months, a few years to build.

Even if you are prepared and destined for success, there are other risks you need to be aware of. DUIs, cops, potholes, some debris.sudden break down of your car or the car in front. Fed meetings, elections, earnings, political and natural disasters, scandals, downgrades, employment numbers, inflations, bullish calls and bearish comments on CNBC, and whatnot. You can't control any of this shit! There is really so much that is acting against you! Still, like a hero, you are on the 405 every morning and every evening. 

And yes, last but not least. Those backseat drivers. You are the one who is driving but many times, your spouse or a friend gives you tips and ideas about how to drive. You are 20 years veteran on the freeway. They really don't drive but they seem to think that they are a better driver than you. They really don't play the market but they believe they know more than you. They are as annoying as the markets at times ;) However, as a driver, the roads have taught us to be patient, to be tolerant, be respectful to the rules, to the signs, to fellow traders, and to back-seat drivers. Whatever the cause is for a loss in the trade, it is because of the choice we made. We put our lives in the middle of 80 mph speed, and our little money in front of millions of vultures and Wall Street wolves every day. Sometimes we win, and sometimes we lose. We take responsibility and do not pass the blame on to someone else. This is what the market has taught me, and the roads have strengthened.

Good night.  Oh, if you survived this post up to this line, I am sure you would like this post about 405 on my Facebook page!

 

#1 New friends: Hummingbirds.

 New friends: Hummingbirds. #1

I watched #CraigFoster's #myoctopusteacher a few days ago. Very captivating, inspiring nature documentary. I don't have a store of that level. However, I find myself with Hummingbirds this year, and I want to talk about them over the next few days.

Thanks to #COVID19, I am not on the #405 freeway and inside some corporate walls most of the days. I get time to go out and walk, hike, bike, and roam around in our backyard. This is an unintended gift of the lockdown. Everything has two sides- good and bad. This year, Hummingbirds- these little birds have become a part of my world. I am going to introduce these little friends, and share some part of my world with you all over the next few days.

Ch 1: New Affection.

I go on #MtMcCoy hike most of these days. It is my new oxygen. I feel suffocated if I am not out in nature at least once a day. At the beginning of 2021, I used to go in the mornings, and in this particular segment of the trail, I would see this Hummingbird. I saw her (not sure him or her but I like to believe it is she) almost every morning. If she was not there, I would wait 5 minutes and she would come! She would sit proudly on these dry branches, and always on the top, overlooking #SimiValley, and probably waiting for me Haha. Hummingbirds are solitary. I have never found two birds sitting on a single branch, next to each other. Here was this bird. Always there, and always alone.

There are multiple trails on this hill but I would always come back the same way, to say hello to this little friend. This was something I would look forward to every morning.

Now I know why she was always there during the early part of 2021. I think January-March is the time period when these birds are relaxed. No nesting. No babies. No responsibilities. Not sure where they sleep or what they do during the day but this little bird was always there, every morning looking over Simi Valley. Making sure the world is safe. (I wish I could do that few months a year: do nothing, be in the flow of the life how nature intended it to be on this planet. No 8-5s, no bills-mortgages, no stocks, no screens, no have tos..)

Here are some photos of my friend.

Look at the freaking conviction..and how others advised him!

 This is simply amazing!

Today, half of the millennials are believing in #Gamsestop $GME and $AMC. 

Here is a guy who started investing, and publishing his positions in $GME when the stock was in pennies. The other, more interesting IMO is how the common wisdom (other reditters) are advising him to get out. I am sure if you put yourself in that discussion at that time, you would probably consider #deepfuckingvalue some maniac too. He proved himself so well over time. This whole thread of him posting his GME positions is legendary. He turned  $100k in $40 million plus today. Simply an amazing piece of miracle in the Wall Street!

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/d1g7x0/hey_burry_thanks_a_lot_for_jacking_up_my_cost/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Life Jugaad- Fund Your Life: Find A Guru. Find a Friend.

In Hindu culture, a guru is considered as important as a mother and father in one's life. Matru Devo Bhav, Pitru Devo Bhav, Guru Devo Bhava. This means, the mother is a god, the father is a god and a guru is a god for one. This symbolizes that a guru or a teacher is as important as a mother and a father in one's life. Mother gives you life and plays a core role in one's early life, Father supports, protects, and prepares before you get on your own. Unlike, the mother and the father, a guru can be different throughout your life. In the beginning, a teacher is a guru who ignites young minds and teaches important skills, imparts knowledge, implants good values. Then, when we become independent, the dependence and support of parents reduce, the same way, the role of a guru also reduces in our life. We are really on our own. We are alone. (We have our spouse now but very few are really lucky and have new support in the form of a spouse but for the most, the marriage adds more challenges than opportunities.) Problems and new situations arise in life, and as an adult, we are supposed to handle them. We try, we learn on our own, sometimes we fail, sometimes we succeed. This is how most of us live our life. In this post, I want the highlight the role of a guru, a support person in our life.

• For our life, we need a Guru. We need someone in our life who
• We often reach a point where our capacity ends. Or we get lost between different choices. We need someone to help us sail through difficult, sometimes unchartered territories.
• There are times, we want to talk something out of our heads. We want someone to listen to us. A guru can be a great advisor.
• Generally, a guru figure is more experienced, more learned, and has a capacity to guide and help find better solutions.

We need to have a friend or someone to whom we can open our hearts, and we can say everything, without hiding anything. Do you such a person in your life? The person we can talk about conflicts, and challenges, problems, and tough situations. Sometimes, we need some guidance from them, other times, we simply need to vent something out of our system. In such times, we want them to listen to us.

Beauty of Nature Around us (Day 30)

  Today, enjoy some flower photos!

Sorry, Google says I am out of my quota for storage! 

Here is a quick Jugaad! I added photos on my WordPress blog: EnjoyMyPhotos here.

We All Are In Good Hands. (Day 29)

We are in good hands. Believe it or not, there is someone, sometimes visible or sometimes with invisible hands, ready to help us, ready to take care of us. Many times we get nervous, we feel sick, we feel helpless, but we need to remember that we are in good hands.

'All is well'. Rancho is a genius in 3 Idiots. In difficult, challenging situations, he keeps telling himself All is Well. Sometimes this can appear as a comedy in the movie but it is not IMHO. We have two minds- conscious and unconscious. The unconscious mind is always like on Autopilot. It is very powerful. It just listens and learns, learns really hard, and does what it has heard. It is a very obedient slave, in a sense. It doesn't ask questions. it just takes commands and does the work. It does what you tell yourself. Try telling yourself that All Is Well in difficulties. Take a pause and then take a deep breath. Then breath out as slowly as you can. When you think you are done, breath out a little more and force out all air from the lungs. Your obedient subconscious mind will start working to make things well for you. If you keep telling yourself you are sick, you are in a problem, you are worthless, and with similar negative things, the subconscious mind takes these negative commands, and acts accordingly. So, instead, talk positively with yourself. It works. Try it next time. You will find that you are in good hands, with your unconscious mind.

There are times we feel sick. Our body has some pain. However, the human body is amazing. The systems in the body immediately start fighting to bring things back to normal. These days, we find shortcuts. We resort to medicines, like Tylenol, to get rid of the pain quickly. I am not a medical expert, nor I am against it. Most of the time we think medicine 💊 is doing the trick; I believe the antibodies and the self-fixing mechanism inside the body are also working to help us. Plus, the trick is in our messaging. When we have a headache, we keep telling us that it is bad, it is going to get worse until we take a tablet. The moment you take Tylenol, your messaging changes. Now you are telling your subconscious mind that you are going to be okay soon. You start feeling that you will be well very soon, and maybe that does the real trick. 

Also, look around us. The birds, animals, insects. Do they get headaches? Fever? Probably they do. I don't know.  However, I know for sure that they don't take Tylenol. It is this self-correcting mechanism inside their bodies that gets them well. Or, nature hints them to do something that would help them. This is true for us too. It is in the DNA of every living being to fight the intruder, sickness, and get the body back on track. If you live life the way nature intended us to live, nature is going to take care of you.

Silly, you forgot about the creative and destructive forces in nature? They go hand in hand. When it seems that you are surrounded by destructive, negative forces, the creative positive forces are acting to get you better. When there is Shiva, Lord Brahma is also there. Lord Vishnu, with the balancing, is there too. However dark the night is, there will be light in the end.

I have heard often from different people that prayers and blessings from their guru or religious leader got them well, cured their sickness. I believe them. I think, their confidence, and belief that the prayers will work, krupa or blessings will work, does the trick. This is like telling your subconscious mind that you are going to be well soon. I think that often does the trick.  

Also, help is around us. If you need help, ask for help. There is no wrong in asking for some help, as long as you are willing to help others who are in need, most other people are ready and happy to help you too. You will be surprised how most friends, family, and even strangers out there are so willing to help you when you are in need. Live and let live. Live and Help Live.

Don't forget to try this next time. Put your right hand on your heart and tell yourself that all is well.